Politics

Politics fascinate me. To a point where I am often in awe when reading about politicians and the devout Republicans and Democrats.

I have only dreamed about having such strong and unwavering conviction on topics such as economic policy, and how an ENTIRE COUNTRY should be run. Sometimes I WISH life could be as black and white as so many democrats and republicans make it seem. Or should I say Red and Blue?

I've considered this theory and I think it reflects the GENERAL overtones of both the republican and democratic parties in this sense:

Republicans believe in a smaller government, fewer taxes, and Democrats look towards a "strong" government and better use of taxes.

So here goes...*

You can tell a republican versus a democrat by the way they drive.

*Please note; the following is not meant to be taken seriously. Really. Like, at all. Except that Texas really DO drive like that. And Ohio is, well, probably fairly accurate in driving as well. However the relations to political party is TOTALLY a joke.

Texas

Buddy down here it's each man for himself, and you better get the HELL out of my way. Or stop when I decide to pull out in front of you, because I WILL. You think I'm going to wait for my light to turn green? FUCK no. My truck is bigger than yours so I have the right of way. So what if I'm driving a Chevy Aveo? My truck is at home. And it's bigger. Take my word for it, because I'm FAR too important and busy talking on my cell phone to explain this to you. Or use my turn signal. Or yield when I'm merging into traffic. I have places to go, and let's face it, I'm more important than you. So get out of my way. More road signs? Shoot, half the people down here can't read, we don't need no new-fangled road signs! Down here we got us some turn-a-rounds or just pop a U-ie if you miss your turn. Stop signs? No ma'am! Stop signs are for CHICKENS, and we're not chickens, we're TEXANS.

Ohio

Well hello there! Sir, can I get over there? I know you're already in the lane but I need to get off on that exit coming up and if you'd be so kind as to let me in. Oh dear, what's the speed limit again? 16? 25? Okay, thanks SO MUCH for letting me over! The 1,304 people stuck behind me really appreciate it, too. See, the problem is we don't have enough road signs!! We should make sure we include more signs and reduce the speed limits to 60 to help everyone get to their destination safer, and permanently late. You know, while we're looking at banning cell phones while driving we should also consider requiring drivers to get out and push their vehicles through school zones to prevent any further accidents. OH! Miss? Was it your turn to go or mine? I never could figure out these four-way stops. How do you know whose turn it is? Shouldn't someone be in the intersection to direct traffic?

Houstonians are TERRIBLE drivers!!! And they KNOW it! Everyone admits to it but no one does anything about it.

Kind of like corruption in politics, I guess.

SO far...

Things are going pretty fantastically in the new year. I've cut back (er... okay, KIND OF cut back) on eating out. It's been difficult the last five or so days with such a wopperjawed schedule. Between meetings, driving back and forth across Houston, and not knowing where I'll be or if a fridge will be available has made packing lunches hard.

And, let's be honest. I'm lazy.

Anywho. I received a camera for Christmas from my lovely lil' sis (Sony Cybershot, 12.1 mp, 5x optical zoom, in dark blue) and tested it out today. I like to take pictures of trees. Mostly cause I like trees. Unfortunately I'm not skilled in photography so most of them just come out looking like, well, trees a 13 year old wanna-be-tree-hugger/future-hippy would take.

However, some end up looking pretty swell. I added one that I feel turned out pretty well. I would add more however I do not have a solid internet connection (AT&T you fail) and it takes several minutes per photo to upload. I'm not patient.

I am working on a project for work for our District 2010 Kickoff meeting (AKA High School Pep Rally by at 7:30am and with adults not highschoolers), and I think it's going to kick some serious donkey behind.

I like team work.

My brand new furniture arrives Wednesday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks, Rooms 2 Go. I got some fantastic furniture and will take pictures of my living room with all my things in it soon. I would also like to say that so far, in living by myself, I am thoroughly impressed myself with my neatness. I had never previously been thought of as "neat" (you can as my previous roommates), but really other than slacking a bit on laundry I am doing darn good. My apartment stays pretty clean, and I spend time on every off day cleaning and straightening up here and there.

New Years Goals

Well,

I don't do new years resolutions. Mostly because I know I will not (even with good intentions) stick to them.

However, I feel starting a new decade, in a new state, and after the deaths of two of the most important parts of my life (my father and my first horse), should come with some changes of my own.

First and foremost, I need to get organized. For the last eight or so months I've felt like my life was a whirlwind and I was just lucky to keep being carried along. Now I have a steady job, a solid income, an apartment (a clean one, too!) and I need to begin to pull myself up on my own two feet. This means figuring out my finances and being better about budgeting. For me this mostly means I need to STOP EATING OUT. I went to the grocery yesterday and purchased some pantry type foods. Potatoes, dried beans, lentils, spices, etc. and I'm going to learn to cook.

I made a Greek yogurt and potato dish yesterday that was pretty damn good if I do say so myself. I boiled some red potatoes, and mixed up garlic, lemon juice, pepper, turmeric, a "dipping spice" mix, and 3 parts Greek yogurt and one part sour cream and it was really good. I think next time I will try leaving out the turmeric, perhaps adding a little dill.

I reheated it today and threw in some fresh broccoli and brown rice. I left the yogurt separate and didn't reheat that just the potatoes, broccoli and rice. I need to start using more grains and rice in my cooking. It will save on the cost and is a bit healthier than my current diet of fast food.

I'm also meeting a girl Saturday to ride her horse and sign a lease. It's fairly cheap, only about $150/month and I'll have the rights to ride twice a week, use her tack and everything. The horse seems nice. He's a chestnut gelding, used to be used for polo. Not sure what to expect but when I went out previously he seemed like a solid horse.

So here it is:

1.) Manage finances smarter. Make a budget and STICK TO IT!!! This means setting aside time each week to look at bills, and make sure I'm not missing anything. It's going to be necessary in a couple months when student loans start rolling in. Coupled with the budgeting, save money by not eating out and packing lunches. Devote more time to cooking and learning how to eat healthier and smarter.

2.) GET ORGANIZED. Sheesh. I feel overwhelmed in my life right now and I need to just plant my feet, slow down and take a look around (Funny: The theme from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air just played in my head). I have plenty of time, it's just a matter of actually taking that time and not goofing off.

I think we'll start there, and see how it goes. I'd say if I had a #3 it would be "Become more active" but that is something I've been working on. Riding twice a week will definitely help with that as well. I also discovered some areas not too far away for decent hiking, such as the Sam Houston National Forest, Conroe Lake, and Huntsville State Park.

Here's to a smoother, more organized decade!

A good life

I have lived a good life. I would consider myself smart, thoughtful, and kind. Not to mention scatterbrained, forgetful and a little mistrusting, but these are all traits that make me who I am.

I have learned so much about myself, and so much about myself has changed over the last six months I'm not sure where to start, other than to say I have lived a good life and I hold my breath in anticipation with what wonders life has yet to throw my way.

One thing I have learned a lot about the last three months is death. I have always felt I have a strong grip on death and the world, and losing two of the most important influences of my life in the span of two months hasn't changed that. Life is death. People, things, die and it leaves room for us to find new people and new creatures to touch our lives.

For now? My heart weeps in unabashed self pity. My father was one of the kindest, hardest working people I have ever known and my heart broke two weeks before he died when he wrote on his notepad "I don't even feel sick, I'm going to beat this." He wrote because he couldn't talk, eat, or breathe normally. But he had the strength to try and smile and write that.

My father will never meet a boyfriend of mine, let alone walk me or my sister down the isle. He will never see my first apartment, or house. My first funeral was my father's funeral. I don't blame cancer, or god, or the doctors or life. I accepted death as a part of life and that didn't change when death came knocking on my father's door... but I'm still really very sad to not have him in my life anymore.

My heart broke again today when I received an email about Katie. It told me about the wonderful family that adopted Katie, then how she went blind and hurt herself only to have to be put down. I haven't seen her for two years, but that mare, that ridiculous, haughty, accident prone horse was my world for nearly six years.

Katie was my world; she knew me. Katie was me as any other being could be me. I have never met a person, horse, or anything else that better fit me, and I doubt I will. I will not forget the cold winter nights I'd go to the barn and sit in her stall... she would come over and sniff my hair, then nuzzle my jacket. She loved when I wore nylon jackets and would rub her nose on my shoulder, snorting at the funny feeling and noise that the slick nylon produced.

I have a good life. I am lucky. But for now, my heart hurts.

Back in the world

I was walking through Eisenhower Park when I remembered that I actually had a blog! That at one point in time I had planned on keeping up with. It slipped my mind for a while amid the two months at camp, MaryAshley's wonderful wedding, and hours upon hours of job searching.

After a week of serious application sending and resume attaching and cover letter writing I've discovered a few things about myself:

1.) I need to start applying to jobs that provide a way to contact them after said resume attaching and cover letter writing... I don't like just sending and waiting. I feel that if I was able to contact someone afterwards I would be more likely to get an interview.
2.) The idea of sending salary requirements in daunting and I know I'm supposed to do the research and such to match the job and my experience and yadda yadda but REALLY?! I have no effing clue.
3.) I need a job. I need a job to feel whole and normal and useful and occupied. I like being busy. I'd rather work 8 hours a day 5 days a week in a somewhat miserable job than have no job at all.

However, being jobless has given me the ability to explore San Antonio a little bit. I got a P.O. Box (woohoo! I can receive mail in the same city I'm living in!), and I've been to two area parks. The first park is north of where I'm staying, it was super busy (about 9:30am on a Sunday) and filled with bikers. The trails were mostly paved with a few narrow bike ways for trail bikes.
The landscape was pretty; tons of thin, twisted, knotted trees and prickly pear cactus amid the browns and faded greens.
The second park, the Dwight D. Eisenhower Park, was nestled between an active rock quarry and a military base. The main trail was paved but most of the trails were covered in mulch. It was pretty and further west. There was more color and it was rocky and hilly and definitely more of a natural park/walking trail kind of feel.

It's not a park like in Ohio, it actually made me miss the rich greens and dark browns and hills of the mid-west. But it's beauty in it's own way, and I really enjoy it. I also have a theory that part of the reason people are nicer here is to make up for the harshness of the climate. It's not harsh like the cold, like Alaska style, it's just sharp and prickly... okay that doesn't make any sense at all, but it made sense in my head.

Actually, about 30 seconds after I thought it made me miss Ohio, I realized what I really missed was horseback riding through the hill country. THAT is what I miss most in San Antonio.

Growing up and such

In twelve days I will begin the journey into adulthood.

Sort of.

I'm setting out for an (approx.) 20 hour drive to work as a camp counselor. I'm getting rid of nearly everything and essentially "starting over." My bed, desk, over half of my clothing, any candles, picture frames, my printer, all of it. Gone. Adios.

I'll spend two months working with horses and children. One of which I have a lot of experience doing, and the other I do not.

I've never been to Texas before (unless you count the four hours spent in the Houston George Bush Intercontinental Airport, then I've been there once), but it's something I am incredibly excited about. I've always wanted to go to Texas, but I'm not sure why. Maybe it's the heat and the horses and the beautiful pictures I drool over, but I feel like there is something there for me.

Last night I was spending some time with friends, listening to all their stories of how they envision Texas. This "Texas" most people envision involves extensive cowboy boots, spurs, fake animals heads, cowboy hats, and stuffed animals stapled haphazardly on the walls, and anywhere they will fit.

I never pictured it that way. I just get a mental image of large, old gnarly trees along a river bank. I also feel like the people are going to be more cordial. But that is about it.

I'm more excited to reinvent myself. I did it went to Evansville for my first year of college. I became more outgoing and personable and created a social aspect of my life I had never really had before.

Whatever happens, it will be good, and a much needed change.

I have grown to really appreciate the city I live in and the people here, but it's the weather I am most looking forward to escaping. I need more sunshine in my life than I get in the Midwest. And warmth.

I will absolutely miss Mae, and my friends, and family. I feel incredibly guilty leaving when my dad is so sick, but I'm not leaving forever, and if necessary I can try and find a job in the area come August. I can always come back, but this job opportunity is not going to come around again.

Selfish, I know, but I never claimed to be perfect.

Burma

"Finding George Orwell in Burma" by Emma Larkin is one of my favorite books.

If you have any interest in George Orwell, or his works, you should read it. It is the story of a journalist (Emma Larkin is a pseudonym) who travels to Burma in order to understand more about Orwell, why he wrote about Burma, and to learn about his experiences there. He spent five years in the colonial army serving in Burma, and officially wrote one book, "Burmese Days" about Burma, but many (especially Burmese) feel "1984" and "Animal Farm" are as well, and in Burma he is often referred to as The Prophet.

I hope I can travel to Burma one day, and I have a secret wish to live there for a while. But mores than that, I just feel some sort of connection. Perhaps the connection is really just due to a well written book. But the more I research the struggles of Burma, the more my heart breaks, and the more I want to be a part of it.

For example, in the book Ms. Larkin discusses the fall of the education system. When Burma was a colony, it had an extremely high rate of literacy, and the majority of the education was done in monasteries. However, when Burma was granted independence and the Military Regime took over, the education system fell apart. In the book one of the reasons is the ability for educated people to fight back. The lower the literacy rate and the less intelligent a people are, the less likely they will be in understanding their oppression. It also makes it easier to isolate the people in Burma from outside media sources. I want to do something about it.

One way Burma has accomplished the destruction of the education system is by requiring the citizens to pay for, build, and staffing of their schools. A third is by requiring all education to be done in the language of Burmese. Although this does not seem to be an issue, Burma is populated by many different ethnicity's and has one of the richest and most diverse collection of people. Forcing everyone to speak Burmese is an effort by the Junta to give an advantage to the Burman ethnic group, and essentially "tax" other ethnicity's.

And Burma is home to Aung San Suu Kyi, my absolute hero.