Islam and the Mexico drug war

Please forgive me if this is poorly written, I am using my phone and a new app to try to blog from.

I read a blog by an uber conservative blogger recently that still has me all hot and bothered. It talked about my generation being a bunch of Jersey Shore watching real wannabe housewives. We are completely disappointing and lost in our reality shows and malls. She also focused on religion and Islam; namely that they are a very scary religion we should go too war against. Her words were scary to say the least and I was more than offended. So I left a comment with many organizations that used christianity as a reason for terror and murder. I also pointed out that taxi drivers and pedestrians have been attacked for appearing to or admiring to be Muslim.

The comment was quickly dismissed because these organizations I named were "not Christians." Which was precisely the point! These organizations at the core are hate organizations with the intent to gain power through violence and intimidation, BUT they used organized religion as a means to organize, recruit and build support. It works.

Look at the Mexico drug trade right now. The big drug cartels, one of which its named "la familia" is a prime example. The highest members go to church and encourage everyone else to do so. The larger organized crime "families" also are known for there family "values"and for keeping religion close to heart.

Islam is not the enemy. The Koran has murder as the SECOND worst sin while it is commandment number 6 in the Bible.

I believe Islam is not the enemy. I believe Muslims come in all shapes, sizes, and spectrums of beliefs. I do not believe we should persecute an entire religious belief due to a subset. We didn't persecute the entire group of peoples who believe in God for the catholic molestation and child abuse issues. Or because of the KKK, Hitler and other "Aryan nation" crazies. Or all mormons because of the crazy ranch in Texas that believed in marrying 12 year old girls to 30 plus year old men.

These are people using the Islamic faith and more than anything the growing American discriminationagainst Muslims to recruit to gain power.

Human Trafficking

According to the U.S. Department of State's 2007 Trafficking in Person's Report, there are approximately 27 million people in modern-day slavery worldwide. Even worse, approximately one MILLION children are exploited by the global commercial sex trade (Dept of State, The Facts about Child Sex Tourism 2005).

I saw a documentary on human trafficking, and I had never looked at it that way. I didn't realize how widespread it was, and that it affected the United States so widely. Even more so, 20% of the human trafficking in the United States is in Texas. Houston is considered one of the biggest hubs of human trafficking, and I'm looking to get involved with Houston Rescue and Restore.

September 18th-26th is the fourth annual Human Trafficking Awareness Week. Keep in mind places where victims of human trafficking are massage parlors, strip clubs, bars, and are usually in seedy locations.

Horses

It rained all day today. No, it didn't rain, it poured. It can't-see-the-highway rained. Trucks spinning off the road rained. Well, that's more of a Texas thing than a rain thing. While my plants were grateful and I am certain we needed the rain, I am a little disappointed that it rained so much. I didn't go to the barn at all this past week, and I know it's only been a week, but I feel like I haven't ridden in forever.

My half-chaps, boots and breeches are starting to look pretty rough. The elastic on the ankles are pulling off, my boots are cracking and the swede on my half-chaps are essentially gone. The half-chaps are fine, but I would like to get new boots and breeches.

My last lesson Jessica rode Sam and I rode Oslo. Jessica was really nervous, and the first 15 or 20 minutes of the lesson were a little tense, but she relaxed and the lesson ended up going really nicely. Oslo is difficult to get used to, but he is amazing. He's so fun to ride and he has such beautiful strides. The biggest challenge for him is setting him up to the jump and making sure not to jump ahead of him.

I've found I struggle the most with finding distances to jumps. I'm hoping we'll do more in the way of gymnastics to help improve that.

I get to see one of my favorite people in the world soon, and that makes me really happy!!

Thoughts

I've been struggling internally a lot lately.
I don't like my job. I'm a little unhappy with my inability to get out and work out the way I want to. I wish I had more time to devote to my community. I want to travel internationally.

My manager asked me this last week "Well, if you're not motivated by money, then what motivates you?"

I really didn't have an answer. Other than horseback riding I had nothing.

Well, I think I found something. Something I am excited about, and something I will think about for a few weeks before discussing it openly. I know it's going to be a little controversial, and not everyone is going to approve.

Exciting new things ahead. I hope this is a path I will pursue to the end.

Life in Houston

One of the hardest parts of moving is losing touch with the friends you have been closest to. I've tried a renewed effort recently to get back in touch, but my attempts have been reached with emptiness on the other line. I don't believe at all that it is intentional, the few that I've been trying with are extremely busy between work, grad school, big cross country moves, and life in general... but it still hurts.

It happened when I left high school, again after leaving Evansville, and again after moving to Texas/Houston.

I also feel that I have changed a lot since moving to Hunt, then again after moving to Houston. Texas has made me a much different person, in a good way. I am more open, more honest with others and myself, and much happier. Leaps and bounds happier. Although I've also realized I've lost touch a little with some of the things I valued about myself. I have become somewhat less tolerant and a little more judgmental of others... a lot of which I blame on my disenchantment with my job, and dealing with customers who know little to nothing about the business process they take part in.

I just wish I could say the same about my job. I began my first "big-girl" job with a lot of high hopes and expectations, and as the months have ticked by with very little reason to believe this job is anything more than a glorified retail corporate B.S. position. I tried to suck it up and manage for a couple months, because I don't really have a choice, but I am miserable. Even more so now that my pay is commissioned. I desperately wish I had $5,000 to throw at them and find a new job.

Houston

I've made it through Thanksgiving, Christmas, my birthday, his birthday, and now father's day since my dad died.
I miss him. I talked about him a lot this weekend with my neighbor/friend/downstairs roomie. I feel weird referring to him as dead. Luckily I remember him more as he was when he was healthy than the last few months.
That being said, some good things in my life.
I have friends. I am building up a great network of horse people, and I am building so much confidence and respect in my riding. I get thrown up on different horses every week, and not just the regular lesson horses, but the special ones.
The owner of the barn I ride at is grooming me to become a coach. It makes me want to stay in Houston for at least a while. I like it here. I don't always feel at home and I constantly miss the hills and hiking and rocks but I'm happy here.

Vacation

I am counting down the days until May 16, when I get to vacation. I cannot begin to describe how burnt out and exhausted I feel. It will be a much needed vacation.

Plans:
Maybe head out to Hunt on the 16th, spend a day or so there, entertain the mcgibbons and free mashley for an evening or so from the in-laws. They're super nice people and she loves them but they're going to be there for about 2 weeks, and she's already over worked!
Pick my sister up at the airport on the 19, spend some time around the house, relax, show her the area. Go downtown, see the museums, and be a little bit touristy. Roadtrip up to Austin, Fredericksburg, Hunt, TX and some other places along the way.

Finally.

I belong in Texas

I was talking to a lady today who is from Pennsylvania. She was complaining profusely about the heat and I was like "what? It's GORGEOUS" and she looked at me with complete disgust and said "it's 87* That is almost NINETY! In APRIL." and I just shrugged.

She was also stressing over her dog (an Australian Labradoodle) jumping up on people. I pointed out that labs AND poodles are notorious for jumping if not trained properly (as are most dogs, but anywho) and she was like "oh NO, he's not a labradoodle, he's an AUSTRALIAN labradoodle, which is a mix of 4 breeds, so he's really only 1/4 poodle, plus he's a FIFTH generation Australian labradoodle, so the personality traits of labs and poodles shouldn't play into it anymore.

Less than 5 minutes of research on the australian labradoodle club page leads me to believe the dog is probably inbred (or as the AKC would call it "line-bred") seeing as there are only 8 "certified" stud dogs within the club (naturally there are probably three or four times as many stud dogs, but these 8 are "Certified" and only about 6 of them look like the same "breed" of dog.
Not to mention there is an "infusion" of Irish water spaniel and cocker spaniel, which means SOME, not an equal percentage. And breeding a straight mix to the exact same breed mix over and over is NOT at all likely to "breed out" traits that BOTH breeds share. Kind of like breeding golden retrievers and an Irish water spaniels together and expecting the mix (even into 5 generations!) to not have a high tendency to like water.
Don't get me wrong, I love mutts, and I would rather see a world full of mutts than one filled with inbred, unhealthy AKC registered purebred dogs. I can also appreciate the desire to combine different breeds in an effort to create healthy PETS, but I do not like when people flaunt these designer breeds as if they are special, or recognized breeds. There is NO breed standard for labradoodles except that they are a cross between labs and mini OR standard poodles (and occasionally water spaniels, cocker/english spaniels, and curly coated labs). Hell, for all we know Oscar could be a labradoodle. There are so many different sizes/shapes/coat colors, textures, etc to create a breed standard.
My point? It's a mutt. a 5th generation mutt. Don't snub my mutt (probably several generations of mutt!) because yours has a fancy name.

Side note: "Walkaway" by the Wood Brothers is lovely.

Today

At work we had a "town hall meeting" to meet with the new president of the south area. Thanks to bad timing on my part, I was essentially toasted for the majority of it. NOT INTENTIONALLY. I ate two packs of oatmeal before leaving and took my pain meds (we're going on a week now and I thought I had built up at least some tolerance. In addition I took HALF of the dosage). Luckily I have a very understanding manager who shielded me from embarrassing myself and guided me through the whole shindig (yes, it was that bad).
Pain medicine is really frustrating. The OTC stuff isn't really strong enough to take the edge off right now, but anything beyond that I can't handle and end up higher than a kite for HOURS. Or did I miss the boat and that's how they work?

Anywho.

I had another stellar lesson today, on Stella! I've ridden the mare three times now and I really like her. She's got an honest, jump, is pretty easy to regulate, does flying lead changes, bends when asked (reluctantly), and is pretty responsive. She jumps REALLY round though, and with a lower head carriage. Generally not a bad thing but the trainer was remarking on how well I ride her, and how many women she's thrown right over her head. One of the women in the class asked why, and I can absolutely see it. When you're over the jump there really isn't much "horse" in front of you. So she already jumps forward and round, and if you're caught off guard AND she jumps big, plus she's round and low up front, there's nothing to grab on to. A lot of horses there's a little bit of neck to hold onto and keep your balance but with her it's just the ground.
Doesn't really bother me much.

Things I'm working on:
1. Keeping my hands closed
2. Staying in "half seat" aka two-point
3. Not playing with the reins (would generally be solved by fixing #1 since my playing is generally me shortening the reins because they side through)
4. Strengthening.

Overall I'm pretty impressed with my current progress and I'm continuing to build my confidence. The class is somewhat scattered with skill level, and I went from the lower jumps to the higher jumps (within the class, still only about 3"-6" difference at most).
I love it though. I got a little nervous today seeing the bigger jumps and the more technical stuff but I just sucked it up and I rode well and even kept my seat when Stella chipped in on one jump and took the other one long.

I love riding like this again. So much. I do however wish I had the ability to do a little self-schooling, just on the flat. No stirrup work and stuff like that.

Car payment coming up. SCARY.

Doctors

I've always thought I had a fairly high tolerance for pain, and that doctors are terrible listeners.
My current doctor working with my jaw is even more evidence as such. He made it VERY clear my jaw pain is "from a direct injury" and interrogated my response as "it started to hurt one morning when I woke up." He asked multiple times if there was ANYTHING I could have done to have caused this, anything I could think of that could have injured my jaw, and aside from punching myself in my sleep, NO. I wanted to be a sarcastic bitch and tell him it was from giving head to a very well endowed boy, but I was too frustrated and in far too much pain to open my mouth without bursting into tears.
It was clear he wouldn't have believed anything I told him anyways, so whether or not I told him the truth (that i woke up and my entire right jaw/cheek was swollen and painful) or lied (it was from a jell-o wrestling match that got violent) it wouldn't have mattered.
So here I lie, a heating pad on my face, my right jaw/gums/cheek tingling, without the ability to eat hard, solid food, or yawn without lots of pain. Not to mention the fatigue, queasiness and misery that comes with taking steroids and strong pain medication, but my neck and head also feel like they are in a vice being squished.
My follow up is tuesday, but I think I'm going to call monday and throw a temper tantrum.

Jumping again

I had my evaluation at a new barn on Monday. After talking the schedule over with my manager I called today and secured my place in the class. First lesson started today, and boy was it amazing. I remembered that I HATED giving up jumping and every time I watched a class I got a little pang of jealousy in my stomach, but I forgot that feeling of getting it right.

The first three times around were a little rough and I forgot to count about half the times but I got the strides right all but once. About the fourth time around (it was set up with two small X's on a line, then coming around the arena and taking a square corner to a small vertical. X's were probably 12" and 4 strides, and vertical probably 18", and after about 3 rounds I figured her out and it was like being a rock star. I would say definitely far from perfection but I felt something coming back. It was confidence. And it felt GOOD.

I clicked really well with Stella, the mare I rode. It was a little shaky at times but I am certain after another ride or two I'll be in much better tune with her. She jumps really up and round so I snatched her face twice on accident and got thrown forward a couple times as well, but both of the last times around were great and really smooth.

Texas hunter/jumpers, here I come.

Life

I haven't updated in a long time (for me anyway). I've been busy and I've had a lot more energy (probably from eating better and exercising more, followed in my other blog with Mashley) so I've been getting out more. I'm already getting a little tan (in March!) and Oscar is learning "stay," "spin," and we're working on sitting from a down. He can sit, then lay down, or sit from standing, but lying down and THEN sitting is pretty tough for the little guy to comprehend.
He also decided to chew on my laptop cord, and shorted that thing out. Which was probably about time anyway, the thing is constantly losing connection to the internet (where my netbook won't), and randomly turns itself off (even if it's not hot) and also freezes unnecessarily. The laptop IS about 5 years old, though, so it's probably about time. I'm just glad I have a backup and do not need to buy another one right away. I need to get my spending (aka eating out) down and make sure my car is going to be okay before I buy another computer.

Speaking of car, my A/C isn't exactly working. Which down here is a must. I'm going to have to get that fixed ASAP before it starts getting into the 100*.

I also got some MUCH needed cleaning today. My apartment was starting to look like a crazy person's house with clothes everywhere and dishes piled up. I also cleaned the fridge and got my bathroom looking good again. I like having a clean apartment, I just need to get better about having the time.

I have an evaluation tomorrow at a somewhat fancy jumping barn tomorrow. I met the woman who runs it and I think I'm really going to like it. I got the impression she knows how to run a business, and also really enjoys it. She was honest, asked frank questions and genuinely listened.

More on that later, right now it's time to go to bed. I am exhausted.

Dogs are sometimes cute

but not all the time.

So Oscar got into the trash a few days ago. I thought I had picked everything up, then went to take a nap and found 2 english muffins (stale, which was why they were in trash) buried in my bed. There originally was 5. I found one on the floor, two in my bed, and assumed he ate the other two.
Wrong. Just found the 4th hard-as-a-rock english muffin buried in my love seat. Naturally by "found" I actually mean Oscar decided today was The Day to eat said English muffin and removed it from between the cushions. (sidebar- "cushions" looks WEIRD when spelled out. I had to dictionary.com it to make sure it was actually spelled right because I didn't believe my Google spell-check (sorry Google.) I digress).

NO telling where bagel #5 is. due to the mass amounts of stomach gurgling over the last few days and yesterday and today's diarrhea my guess is THAT one he did eat.

I have been cleaning crumbs out of my couch for the last two days and now will need to spend the next several days cleaning them out of the love-seat. Thanks, Little Guy.

On a completely different topic, I watched "As far as my feet will carry me" and was thoroughly impressed with it. Netflix has been recommending it for me for weeks and I've ignored it until tonight. Definitely a good foreign film, and it helps that I really do like runaway/chase movies. There are still parts that thoroughly puzzled me but it's probably something I missed somewhere in the translation, or something that would make more sense the second time around.

Today

Today is one of those days...
Wait.
No, this week is one of those weeks where I hate my job. Fifty percent is me being a whiny baby and the other fifty is me being sick and tired of men feeling they can push me around. Not physically of course, but here is the issue.

I see this in many jobs I've held where I work predominantly with men. I share a similar sense of humor, but I have boobs. I'm also a sarcastic person, so often when i'm genuinely complaining it doesn't always register; I'm probably just being sarcastic.
I also am generally someone who has a hard time saying no, even when what is being asked of me is stretching me thin. I also generally feel it is my responsibility to be the ever reliable one. So when everyone else is taking their lunches and not offering to stay late or not showing up for a month (yeah I mean no big deal, right?), I am the person who is called upon to pick up the slack.

Well I finally put my foot down after working more hours than anyone else in the store this week. And probably last week. So when I put my foot down and say "NO, I'm already scheduled 50 hours this week and 6 day. Not to mention I was here and running errands on my one day off, I'm not going to stay late I don't care if Michael Jackson comes back to life for one more appearance in my store, I'm not staying late (which I did anyways) the general response is "well you're a leader in training, get used to it."
And that makes me want to turn violent. Because usually the follow-up comment is "this is retail, didn't you know that?" And that makes me want to throw sledge hammers and squish people into tiny piles of goo that I can burn and turn into tar and roll over with a steam roller on the hot roads. I spent about 7 years working in the hospitality industry, busting my ass, while in high school and full time college. No one else in my store including my managers are working 6 day weeks, yet I am, and I'm expected to just keep on keepin' on because "it's retail"?

No sir. No Sirs. No more throwing Kara's business cards away, or pushing shit off on me last minute so you can leave by 5:15 and I can stay an extra 2 hours. I am putting my foot down and if I have to stomp on someone in the process, prepare to be crushed. We were told we have a "communication" issue. Well I'm about to start communicating and earning some respect Aretha Franklin style, giant knockers and all.

That being said, I still like my co workers and I still like my job and the people who come in every day, even though sometimes I want to strangle everyone.

I just need a big, fat vacay.

Teddy's 3rd visit

This time Teddy found me. He came running up, wiggling and clearly happy to see me. I never had to tell him to come, he followed me around my apartment complex and straight up the 2 flights of stairs, stopping only once to lift his leg on a bush and check out the downstairs neighbor's plant.

After calling the police for my legal duty and an animal hospital for my civic duty, he's currently whimpering in my bathroom.

I have a connection (albeit weak) at the local ASPCA that I'm hoping will overlook his collar for a day and get him neutered. At least. I might be able to "lose" his collar for a few days as well. He's clearly not healthy and far too friendly to be wandering the streets. Especially with usable, procreationing balls.

Am I being a bitch? Probably.
Am I probably not abiding by law? Clearly not.
Am I benefiting society, and the little dog? I think so.

Oscar's progress

Well I've officially had Oscar about a month. I cannot begin to explain how fantastic this little dog is. I am a very lucky dog owner!
Let's recap:
When I first got him I tested out all the basic commands and got absolutely no indication of any understanding. Not a flick of an ear or a thought directed towards me. Even small changes in my voice led to little response from him unless it was very harsh or very excited. He would crawl into my lap at any chance and slept the majority of the first week. Vet cleared him health wise just said he as a very exhausted terrier. Approx. 1-2 years.
He pulled at the leash a lot and scratched at the door. Lots of jumping and play-biting. Some playful snaps at the face, which was quickly reprimanded.
He throws himself around and generally ends up in a twisty pretzel while I'm attempting to snap his leash on. He flails and submits and wiggles and thrashes instead of standing on his two feet. Also likes to lay down at the bottom of the stairs and give the sad eyes.

A month later:
Commands:
Come is 100% at home. 90% at the dog park. We're still working on come while in the middle of dog play time. I usually can get him to at a minimum look at me, but actually overcoming the excitement of playtime is still a work in progress.
Down: Unless food is involved there is usually a stare-down involved. But generally if I wait it out for about 5-10 seconds he flops down quickly.
I've slacked of extremely too much in sit and stay, but he's done well in the little we've worked with it.
We had a week long stint of dumpster diving (aka getting into my trashcan and spreading it all over the apartment) but I caught him in the act twice and I very firm no and mean looks seem to have stopped that behavior.
Stopping the jumping/scratching/flailing at the door is a major work in progress, but I'm doing a couple fake-outs a day and today he sat almost long enough for me to snap the leash on and got HUGE pats for that.
He has a big dog bone that seems to have helped limit his enjoyment of dragging my clothes all over the house.
95% of the time on the leash he doesn't pull. Still working on this around other dogs and going down the stairs, but he's figuring out pulling means we just stand still or move backwards and that's definitely not what he wants.
Overall he's been super easy. Another 5 minutes a day actively training and I'm certain I'd have an exceptionally trained dog. But I'm lazy and I'm pretty happy with adequately trained dog.

Good Samaritanism and Dog Adoptions

I've felt like quite the good Samaritan the last few days. First the return of the perpetually loose dog, secondly I managed to NOT eat the granola bar I keep in my purse for more than a day and gave it to one of the guys that stands in the intersection begging for food/money/"anything helps." I generally keep one or two to hand out but I often eat them before giving them away (bad me). The little old man said "god blesses you" and even though I think that's a bunch of BS (it's going to take a lot more than giving a granola bar to a beggar for god to bless me!) the smile he had was pretty durn genuine and worth it.

Then today at the dog park I met a lady who is an adoption advocate and goes around trying to adopt dogs out of the shelters, or find foster homes for them. She asked how old Oscar was and where I got him and when I told her she asked how long I'd had him. She works mostly out of the Montgomery County Animal Shelter where I got Oscar and she said she remembered him! After walking through the process in my head when I was there, I remembered talking to her and telling her I didn't know if I should get Oscar or not. She said "don't worry about the other dogs, the little guys find homes fast, just follow your heart." Cheesy yes but in a dog shelter, with all that sadness, it is perfect advice. She seemed quite nice and I'm hoping to get involved with her and help work some of the events. I've been looking for some volunteer opportunities and since living in an apartment makes fostering dogs difficult, I figure helping find other people may be beneficial.

THEN as I'm sitting down to get my Netflix on I checked one of my social networking groups and a guy had sent me a message. After a bit of rambling about being from Michigan and how crazy Houston drivers are he goes "..oh and I noticed you have horses, I have 4 of them now and very new to the whole horse thing! Any pointers????"

At which point I of course tried to scream, claw out my eyeballs and pull my hair out. Since that didn't do any good I'm going to try and talk to him and see what the situation is, and either convince him to get rid of 1 to all of them, at least educate him in minimal care, or find out where the hell he lives and call HSPCA on his ass. My exact words were "my best advice to you is to find homes for at least 3 of them" then softened the blow by stating "even people with the best intentions can get overwhelmed with ONE horse, I can't imagine how tough 4 is."

Anywho, the woman grilled me on Oscar and seemed beyond thrilled with how well he's doing. When I told her he hasn't had a single accident or chewed anything significant up, or caused any general disasters she was impressed. When I explained sometimes I have long work days she asked if he was crated or if I took him to a pet-care and I said neither and she was SHOCKED.

I am too, really. I mean first- terrier. second- puppy (1-2years) third- TERRIER PUPPY. Hello?! My apartment should be a disaster.

I am pretty lucky to have such a good little guy. Who spent 2 hours at the park today and is currently passed the EFF out. I think he's going to get groomed tomorrow.

When should a dog be removed from his home?

Okay.

So the week I got Oscar I met this small light tan colored, short haired mutt similar in size to Oscar. SUPER sweet dog, running loose in the apartment complex, complete with collar and name/phone number/address tag. I didn't have my phone so I picked him up and carried him to my apartment, got my phone and my spare leash, and called said number. Since it was dark outside and I got him inside to better light I realized he was VERY skinny. As in not healthy dog skinny. But due to his disposition and the tag I thought perhaps he was older or had a health problem. In addition I am not one to judge as the dog I recently got was also quite skinny. Still is, but he's looking better.

The lady acted like it was a non-event, and goes "yeah he does that some times" and seemed torn about what to do because she was "all alone with an infant who was sleeping and couldn't leave him." Again, not being one to judge (who calls their child "an infant"? I thought the general parental term was "my baby" or something less scientific) I offered to bring him over. Turns out it's somewhat far, however the dog probably took a shortcut through the neighborhoods and hopefully not along the main road. Which is busy and lacks sidewalks, or a lot of space off the road to walk on. And is right next to a major freeway.

So.

Brought the dog over to her HUGE house with castle like qualities and fancy twisted brick arches over the driveway which led to a MASSIVE garage. I pulled into the driveway in front of the white escalade, and she came out and picked him up and said thank you and he wagged and trotted up the sidewalk. She told me he was their "Ike find" (I didn't realize hurricanes were like garage sales, but perhaps I have much to learn) and went inside. P.S. A middle aged man (presumably her husband) was standing at the bay window watching... alone with your infant? really?

Today, about 11:15 after watching Letters from Iwo Jima I took Oscar out and between two parked cars saw a familiar tan dog. He came walking up to me and growled at Oscar a little then wagged his tail and followed me down two apartment buildings and up two flights of stairs, and walked right into my apartment. He's just as skinny (it's been about 3 weeks probably) and had diarrhea smeared in his fur. I offered him some food and water (refused both) and called. Again. This time she came to pick him up. He saw the car and wiggled and I let him off the leash and he ran up to the car happily and jumped inside

I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying mean things. I wanted to drill her on her ability to care for the dog and threaten her with all the bad things that could possibly happen to Teddy, and threaten to take him to the pound. And demand they neuter him. But I didn't.

Why? Well for one, he was clearly happy to see them. And maybe he is just a really amazing escape artist. There's no excuse for the lack of neutering but I didn't have anywhere to keep him overnight without risk of an all out dog brawl, or diarrhea smeared on my couches.

And there really is no way to guarantee a better alternative. I can take him to a pound/adoption place where they'll probably just send him home anyway, or hopefully find him a better home, but there's no guarantee. I sure as hell don't need another dog although he's quite awesome.

But the reality of it is, he's running loose to get hit by a car, spread disease and make unnecessary puppies. So next time... what would be the best course of action?

Philosophy on dog training

I'm not a dog trainer. I don't have the patience, or really the big problem is my attention span.

Wait, what was I talking about again? Oh...

I've been thinking a lot about dog training (and horse training) and pet peeves.

This is what I have to say about dog training, and my dogs.

I love dogs because they are DOGS. Dogs are not children. I am not Oscar's mom, and I do not want to be. If I wanted children I would have them, but as you know I do not. I got a dog because dogs are NOT children, and I do not want to treat them that way.

Dogs (and children, but this post is not about children) need LEADERS not parents. Dogs need to be dogs and have a pack. Even a two member pack. Dogs need to NOT be the leader of the pack. So far I think oscar gets it. I can say no firmly and give him a look and 99% of the time he'll stop what he's doing and give me the "sorry" sad face.

We're up to 99% for "come" when we're inside, and about 50% outside with distraction. If I get his attention and crouch down at the dog park MOST of the time he'll come running and barrel into my lap for pats and "good boys" but if he's playing or making his initial rounds about the perimeter to "mark" his territory, he's not going to come for anything. However he usually will look up if I say his name, and check himself if I say no.

The only issue we've really had in the dog parks so far is really due to his youth and size. He's too exuberant and large to play with the small dogs (even though he's only 20lbs and fits in the small dog category), but usually bites off more than he can chew with the big dogs and gets scared and snappy.

I love being able to take him to the dog parks (there's one about 40 min away but it's 14 ACRES and offers a huge area for him to sniff around), and he LOVES playing with the other dogs, and he really needs the space for exercise), but he likes to play REALLY rough and it usually leads to him getting scared and snappy. He will usually just try and put them in their place but several times they don't back off or give him room and I'm worried it's going to get ugly.

I think I just need to stop worrying. Like I said before they're dogs. Dogs will be dogs and sometimes dogs scuffle.

Ring Manners and Riding

I've been riding for the last few weeks with a lady, Sue, who came into my work. She is a really nice woman and her daughter, Stacy, who is about 30 is also really sweet. They have three horses, two TB's and a TB/hanovarian.

Andy is a flea-bitten gray 19 year old OTTB. He's a little lazy but not at all difficult, but has some nerve damage due to EMP and needs a little extra work to keep him collected. Carousel is a 22 year old TB mare who is no longer ridable due to, I think, Founder. They told me but I honestly don't remember.

The TB/Hano is 6 years old, the daughter of their mare, and a bully of a brutish (beautiful) mare. She kicks when you ask her to move forward, she's pushy on the ground and she's not afraid to walk up to you in the field with ears pinned and a menacing look on her face. I'm still gaining trust and respect so I'm not asking for much, but I would really, really like to give her some serious ground manner training. Both of them are really nice, solid, intelligent horse women, but I have a feeling dealing with this sort of an attitude is probably something they're not quite used to.

They did let me ride her today, though. Just briefly and after my ride on Andy. Stacy rode her during my lesson and I felt she did a pretty good job of handling her. She rode her through their hiccups and didn't let up when she tried to kick out and suddenly drop to a standstill. But she's a serious "pretty-pretty princess" mare with a dominance complex and I have a feeling a couple solid whacks with the dressage whip when she kicks out may settle her a little bit. I feel a short, solid negative reaction would be more effective than ignoring the behavior.

When I got on her I asked her for a trot, all I got was a sidestep (in an effort to scrape me off on a jump standard) and a defiant toss of the head. Several kicks and clucks only resulted in her cow kicking and tossing her head back at me. I grabbed a dressage whip and tapped her shoulder and that got her trotting a little, but she'd randomly just completely stop and pin her ears.

-

Now.

Ring manners.

Stacy and I were in the large jumping arena when three women came in to join us. It's a big enough arena (it's huge, actually) that 5 horses would barely have any issues. The jumps add a little problems, but nothing crazy. They didn't warm the horses up at all, just immediately started into a various trotting patterns, circles, randomly changing direction, etc. They were all friendly and introduced themselves to me and said hello and such, but one lady walked over to the trot poles Sue had set up FOR TODAY and starts to move them again. Sue goes "alright Kara head over the trot poles" and I said "actually, I can't, she's moving them" and Sue turns to her and goes "actually we're using those."

The lady continues moving the pole and goes "right NOW?" and Sue was like "yes, right now. I set them up for us to use. What did you need it for?" and she was like "I just need a pole."

Did you notice how I said we're in a large jumping arena? With SEVERAL jumps set up? And poles lying around EVERYWHERE? She huffed and dropped the pole without bothering to put it back where it was and went to the other side of the arena and moved one of the like 4 poles lying by unused standards. Then they'd randomly all stop and gather in the middle of the arena (blocking the ability to use the trot poles) and stop and talk.

They commented on how "nicely" Andy was moving, but you could tell it was in a "...for him" sort of way. Andy is a fairly well put together horse, nothing super special, but for a 19 year old OTTB he's damn good looking, and healthy.

I was so annoyed by their incredibly snobby, bitchiness I could puke.

On to a happier note.

The first time I rode Andy I felt so unbalanced and discombobulated and disjointed I was wholly disheartened by my inability to ride more than effectively. I used to be effective AND pretty. I was good. Damn Good.

But i consoled myself by reminding me that I haven't been in a regular lesson program since I was about 18, and only taken sporadic lessons since. Granted I rode Katie fairly regularly she was NOT at ALL a confidence builder. Working at camp this summer gave me a completely different riding experience, was an incredible confidence builder and gave me a much better outlook and seat.

However it did nothing for making me a pretty dressage rider.

Two lessons later I feel like I improved 500%. I'm not back to my 17 year old self, but seriously?! lol, not going to happen for a while. I don't have the muscle tone or consistent riding time I did then.

That being said, I cannot express the excitement and happiness I feel having a riding routine.

Healthcare

First of all, I would like to say I am FAR from labeling myself as a democrat. Maybe I am, I don't know, but damned if I will label myself as a democrat.

However, the current "republican tea party" movement makes me want to stab myself in the eye. They're running around blaming Obama for the mess we're in... WHAT THE...? We're blaming big government but not big business? Why has the blame shifted from the banks, GM, Ford, Chrysler? Why are we not holding Bush accountable? How much LESS debt would we be in if we hadn't entered in a full scale war (this is not an argument for or against the war, simply a financial point I'm making)? THAT was not Obama. Obama did not control the market research GM, Ford, and Chrysler failed to do, which has caused a significant collapse in the auto industry. He did not control the auto industry that failed to put together the most OBVIOUS piece of economics together... when the price of oil goes up, people are going to try to buy less gas. I.E. more fuel efficient cars, buying fewer cars, and driving less. They should have seen that YEARS ago, and planned. The price of oil has been going up quickly and steadily for what, 9 years? It wouldn't have prevented anything for sure but it could have made life a little easier and less bankruptcy filled for some.

In addition I really dislike the american car maker's methods of manufacturing. Make as many cars as possible and sell them to the dealers and hope like hell they sell them. One of the main reason's Honda and Toyota have been so successful throughout this is not because they happened to make the smaller, more fuel efficient cars (it sure helped though, and was not a fluke. They've done better with research and development in the more recent years, in my opinion). It was because they made cars on demand. When dealers requested cars, they sent them. No excess inventory sitting around and wasting space and money.

Now.

The health care industry has been failing to provide adequate healthcare for years. According to the people who watch Fox News, the current health bill is going to "tax people who can't afford healthcare"

...

Really?

I need to do more research to verify this, but as someone who studied the healthcare industry (and worked for it) for almost a year, I am no expert. What I can say though, is the basic economics of healthcare and why it's currently failing.

Essentially it's gambling. As a healthcare insurer, you get together a large group of people, they all pay you a small amount of money and you hope you get to keep it all. But likely a few people are going to get sick, or injured, so you have to cover that with the money they paid you. But as expenses and costs increase, so does the premium the people pay to you. The higher the price, the more likely young, healthy people (who don't think they need it) are going to stop paying. As well as the poorer people. So because young healthy people are more likely to participate in risky activities, if they don't have insurance and get in a car accident or fall while mountain biking or horseback riding or what have you, they still have the right to care. And because poor people are less likely to take care of themselves (vitamins, regular checkups, etc.) they're more likely to go to the hospital when they're VERY sick (or dying), and someone has to pay for that.

Because neither the young nor the poor are likely to be able to afford the big bills, the hospitals have to increase THEIR costs to make up for what they lose in caring for those without insurance. So in turn the insurance companies increase their premiums to cover increasing costs, and more healthy people fall out of the pool.

What that means, too, is insurance companies are insuring fewer healthy people to help cover their costs of paying for the less healthy, they have to increase their premiums, or reduce the coverage.

I'll go back to why I said it's gambling. Casino's can only make money if the chances of winning aren't very good. Insurance companies can only make money if the chances of paying out on claims is also low. The fewer healthy people paying premiums, the higher the chances of a claim, and so they have to increase the premiums to cover the chances of payout.

Getting denied a claim, or having a $600 bill on stuff you assumed the insurance company was going to cover, because you followed protocol and sent in all the paperwork you were supposed to, week over week, getting "approved" to continue with treatment, only to get that $600 bill in the mail a few weeks later detailing all the costs the insurance company decided they weren't going to pay for, sucks.

So essentially the losers at the casino are the healthy people paying insurance. The more people who win/get sick, the less money there is to go around to pay out winners or cover other sick people.

So sick people get denied claims and the costs go up for everyone.

If you are a casino owner and you want more payouts, you have to get more people into the casino.

If you are an insurer and you want to cover more claims, you need more healthy people to pay into the pool to cover the claims.

Think about it this way;

With what I said above it seems like the healthy people are paying for the sick people to get better. Which is true, and right now the ones with insurance, they're paying a LOT of money. Those that have insurance though have a cushion against illnesses and injuries that come up, and if something bad happens, it's worth the money. BUT if more people were covered under insurance the premiums would go down for everyone.

I'm not going to argue for or against Obama's plan, but it's required to have car insurance for the same reasons as it should be required to have health insurance. It's for every individuals best interest AND for the greater good's interest. Whether or not Obama's health bill will achieve that I do not know, but just about anything is better than what we have now.

New dog

Oscar. I adopted him Monday, March 1st from the Montgomery County Animal Shelter in Conroe, TX.

He's about 20lbs, and needs about 2-3 more to be at a solid, healthy weight. He's probably about a year to two years, and is definitely a terrier. His face is very JRT like, and as he fills out, we will see if his body gets that look. But right now he's pretty narrow, with a deep chest and lanky, whereas most JRT tend to be rounder and more muscular.

Some thoughts on his confirmation:

His head is flat and the back of his head is kind of pointy, his back is slightly longer than he is tall, and his wire haired coat gets curly and stands straight up when wet (hilarious). His tail is long and muscular and when he walks he hold it straight with a slight curl upward. He has a strange gait, where his hips seem fairly wide-set and has a good wiggle when he trots.

Personality:

He gets along really well with other dogs, and LOVES to play chase. He growls a LOT in play and loves to play-bite. When he's just with me he loves to roll over on his back and wiggle around and play bite. Still learning about toys.

So far he's figuring out "sit" and "down." He definitely gets "no" and seems to fairly well understand "come." Generally if I can get his attention he will come running. This worked exceptionally well when he got loose the other night, as soon as he saw me get out of my car he stopped and looked at me. I bent down and called him and he came bounding over. He also did it several times at the dog park, where I called, knelt down and he came running.

I'm planning on crate training him, but as of yet he hasn't needed it. I still want it to be available for when maintenance comes, or other scenarios but as of yet he's been a model apartment dog. Minus the chewing up my camera cord and ironing cord, both of which happened while I was home.

I'm adjusting to having a dog again, and I feel it has been 100 times easier as a sole resident in the household. I get to be the leader, trainer, and there isn't anyone else trying to work with him. I got a head collar for him and I'll be working on walking better on the leash as soon as he gets better with wearing it. I'm just having him wear it for about 5 minutes every now and then, will probably start using it to walk him as soon as the weather gets a tiny bit better.

Side note

I decided this week I need a dog. I feel like I'm in a better groove at work. I'm financially settled enough to take on the responsibility, and I could use the companionship. So I've been browsing petfinder and I will be making a trip this week to the pound. I've emailed a few people about dogs I've seen on petfinder but I'll likely snatch one up at the montgomery county animal shelter this week. They tend to be the dogs in the greatest need, but I'm NOT going to just grab the first dog I see. I love Mae to DEATH but if I get another dog like her I will stab my eye out. I want a calmer, more obedient dog.

I'm also going friday to look at a horse to lease. He's an eighteen year old thoroughbred who needs a bit more exercise than he's currently getting. I'm under the impression he is mostly retired. The lady seems nice and he's at a dressage barn. His owner seemed very down to earth and sweet, so I'm hopeful it's going to be a laid back, fun dressage barn, not an uppity dressage queen castle.

I also removed several people from my life recently. A few more directly, but mostly from my facebook. This weekend was really hard. It finally hit me that Katie was dead. And next month is my sister's birthday, and my dad won't be here for that.

And I realized that girls I've known for 8, 10, 12 years haven't even checked in on me. One person specifically I am so incredibly disappointed in. I completely understand we all get busy and sometimes in life we lose touch (I am the worst at calling people), but I can't imagine someone I've been close with for A DECADE losing their father and their horse (or dog, or whatever), knowing that friend was very close to BOTH and doing nothing. I can't imagine not at least calling or sending a card, or flowers, or ANYTHING.

I've been fairly happy, all things considered, but I need to bring happiness into my life. I can't sit around waiting for my so-called "friends" to be there for me. Clearly, that is not going to happen.

So I'm going to make some room to go out and FIND friends that will. I've been very lucky to have some amazing friends (MaryAshley and Ellen, you two are amazing and I love you to pieces) but in order to bring happiness into my life I'm going to go out and find it. And if you can't be there for me through the tough times, you surely don't deserve to be there for the good ones!

Dating

Dating.

What IS dating?

As my closest friends will tell you, I am not very good at it. Mostly because I have no idea what it is.

I'm not really looking to get married (anytime soon), but I enjoy company and being active and meeting people. My friends will also tell you that I am, in their words "extremely picky" but I would like to say that I tend to suck at dates. In the sense that dates go, usually, pretty hilariously bad for me.

I tend to look at dating as getting to know someone, such as a new friend. However dating is usually a lot more complicated. However, I tend to get mixed up in the beginning; the easy part. Such as the "showing up or calling at the time specified previously," or the "not inviting other girls to movies without telling either girl" part. Yes, that actually happened.

Dating is confusing and makes no sense. Although it can be fun and usually (at least in my case) ends up in very entertaining stories. Which I feel this blog would be perfect for sharing my frequent mishaps. More to come on that later.

In other words, I will likely be getting a tattoo soon. Actually a couple. I have one planned with my sister (although I don't think she knows it yet) for my birthday in May. And one I'm considering as early as next week.

It's been something I've been considering for several months, but until recently have I actually found a design/concept that fits what I want. Now I just need to head to an artist and get a sketch and everything set up.

Politics

Politics fascinate me. To a point where I am often in awe when reading about politicians and the devout Republicans and Democrats.

I have only dreamed about having such strong and unwavering conviction on topics such as economic policy, and how an ENTIRE COUNTRY should be run. Sometimes I WISH life could be as black and white as so many democrats and republicans make it seem. Or should I say Red and Blue?

I've considered this theory and I think it reflects the GENERAL overtones of both the republican and democratic parties in this sense:

Republicans believe in a smaller government, fewer taxes, and Democrats look towards a "strong" government and better use of taxes.

So here goes...*

You can tell a republican versus a democrat by the way they drive.

*Please note; the following is not meant to be taken seriously. Really. Like, at all. Except that Texas really DO drive like that. And Ohio is, well, probably fairly accurate in driving as well. However the relations to political party is TOTALLY a joke.

Texas

Buddy down here it's each man for himself, and you better get the HELL out of my way. Or stop when I decide to pull out in front of you, because I WILL. You think I'm going to wait for my light to turn green? FUCK no. My truck is bigger than yours so I have the right of way. So what if I'm driving a Chevy Aveo? My truck is at home. And it's bigger. Take my word for it, because I'm FAR too important and busy talking on my cell phone to explain this to you. Or use my turn signal. Or yield when I'm merging into traffic. I have places to go, and let's face it, I'm more important than you. So get out of my way. More road signs? Shoot, half the people down here can't read, we don't need no new-fangled road signs! Down here we got us some turn-a-rounds or just pop a U-ie if you miss your turn. Stop signs? No ma'am! Stop signs are for CHICKENS, and we're not chickens, we're TEXANS.

Ohio

Well hello there! Sir, can I get over there? I know you're already in the lane but I need to get off on that exit coming up and if you'd be so kind as to let me in. Oh dear, what's the speed limit again? 16? 25? Okay, thanks SO MUCH for letting me over! The 1,304 people stuck behind me really appreciate it, too. See, the problem is we don't have enough road signs!! We should make sure we include more signs and reduce the speed limits to 60 to help everyone get to their destination safer, and permanently late. You know, while we're looking at banning cell phones while driving we should also consider requiring drivers to get out and push their vehicles through school zones to prevent any further accidents. OH! Miss? Was it your turn to go or mine? I never could figure out these four-way stops. How do you know whose turn it is? Shouldn't someone be in the intersection to direct traffic?

Houstonians are TERRIBLE drivers!!! And they KNOW it! Everyone admits to it but no one does anything about it.

Kind of like corruption in politics, I guess.

SO far...

Things are going pretty fantastically in the new year. I've cut back (er... okay, KIND OF cut back) on eating out. It's been difficult the last five or so days with such a wopperjawed schedule. Between meetings, driving back and forth across Houston, and not knowing where I'll be or if a fridge will be available has made packing lunches hard.

And, let's be honest. I'm lazy.

Anywho. I received a camera for Christmas from my lovely lil' sis (Sony Cybershot, 12.1 mp, 5x optical zoom, in dark blue) and tested it out today. I like to take pictures of trees. Mostly cause I like trees. Unfortunately I'm not skilled in photography so most of them just come out looking like, well, trees a 13 year old wanna-be-tree-hugger/future-hippy would take.

However, some end up looking pretty swell. I added one that I feel turned out pretty well. I would add more however I do not have a solid internet connection (AT&T you fail) and it takes several minutes per photo to upload. I'm not patient.

I am working on a project for work for our District 2010 Kickoff meeting (AKA High School Pep Rally by at 7:30am and with adults not highschoolers), and I think it's going to kick some serious donkey behind.

I like team work.

My brand new furniture arrives Wednesday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks, Rooms 2 Go. I got some fantastic furniture and will take pictures of my living room with all my things in it soon. I would also like to say that so far, in living by myself, I am thoroughly impressed myself with my neatness. I had never previously been thought of as "neat" (you can as my previous roommates), but really other than slacking a bit on laundry I am doing darn good. My apartment stays pretty clean, and I spend time on every off day cleaning and straightening up here and there.

New Years Goals

Well,

I don't do new years resolutions. Mostly because I know I will not (even with good intentions) stick to them.

However, I feel starting a new decade, in a new state, and after the deaths of two of the most important parts of my life (my father and my first horse), should come with some changes of my own.

First and foremost, I need to get organized. For the last eight or so months I've felt like my life was a whirlwind and I was just lucky to keep being carried along. Now I have a steady job, a solid income, an apartment (a clean one, too!) and I need to begin to pull myself up on my own two feet. This means figuring out my finances and being better about budgeting. For me this mostly means I need to STOP EATING OUT. I went to the grocery yesterday and purchased some pantry type foods. Potatoes, dried beans, lentils, spices, etc. and I'm going to learn to cook.

I made a Greek yogurt and potato dish yesterday that was pretty damn good if I do say so myself. I boiled some red potatoes, and mixed up garlic, lemon juice, pepper, turmeric, a "dipping spice" mix, and 3 parts Greek yogurt and one part sour cream and it was really good. I think next time I will try leaving out the turmeric, perhaps adding a little dill.

I reheated it today and threw in some fresh broccoli and brown rice. I left the yogurt separate and didn't reheat that just the potatoes, broccoli and rice. I need to start using more grains and rice in my cooking. It will save on the cost and is a bit healthier than my current diet of fast food.

I'm also meeting a girl Saturday to ride her horse and sign a lease. It's fairly cheap, only about $150/month and I'll have the rights to ride twice a week, use her tack and everything. The horse seems nice. He's a chestnut gelding, used to be used for polo. Not sure what to expect but when I went out previously he seemed like a solid horse.

So here it is:

1.) Manage finances smarter. Make a budget and STICK TO IT!!! This means setting aside time each week to look at bills, and make sure I'm not missing anything. It's going to be necessary in a couple months when student loans start rolling in. Coupled with the budgeting, save money by not eating out and packing lunches. Devote more time to cooking and learning how to eat healthier and smarter.

2.) GET ORGANIZED. Sheesh. I feel overwhelmed in my life right now and I need to just plant my feet, slow down and take a look around (Funny: The theme from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air just played in my head). I have plenty of time, it's just a matter of actually taking that time and not goofing off.

I think we'll start there, and see how it goes. I'd say if I had a #3 it would be "Become more active" but that is something I've been working on. Riding twice a week will definitely help with that as well. I also discovered some areas not too far away for decent hiking, such as the Sam Houston National Forest, Conroe Lake, and Huntsville State Park.

Here's to a smoother, more organized decade!